Love Letter Lost

You are my optimum time, my perfect exposure, my key of C.

My dark roasted coffee in the early morning and the taste of sweet red wine at twilight. My favorite book, with its familiar creases and folds, telling me the stories I long to hear over and over again.

The voice in the night that shakes me from my own darkness, the skin that cools my soul when it is burning down and warms my weary heart again.

You are the pianissimo to the fortissimo in my thoughts, the rolling tide to the crashing of my wild heart.

You are the wage I have struggled to earn, the battle I have been fighting, and hands pressed together in treaty, rain on the tin roof of my dreams and the soulfful harmonica keeping time with my acoustic heart.

You are the everything and the always, the never was and has beens wrapped into a promise of forever and missed moments lost for a lifetime.

I am the light shining into your dark waters, beckoning you home.

I am yours.

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All I ever wanted was to be touched by someone who could actually touch me.

Someone who could put their hands on me and radiate magic with me. Someone who’s presence I could feel. Someone who’s power radiated with mine. Like the hum of a bass line, and the stroke of the drum, someone who would sway and dance with me.

He would wake in the morning and be sitting in the kitchen, drinking the strongest coffee and breathing in the dawn when I joined him, wrapped in his sweater. There would be a smile at the side of his lips at the sight of my wild hair and bare feet on the cold autumn floors. He would pull himself begrudgingly from my kiss on his way out the door to work, his boots only half tied so that he could taste me just one extra time before eight hours apart. My baby would get lost in thoughts of our tangled breath in the midnight during his lunch break and tell the boys that he couldn’t meet for drinks tonight, because he was taking his lady out. He would pick me up and I would be wearing that blue dress he loves, my hair long and my eyes full of magic for him. We would go and listen to beautiful music, and he would ask me to dance in the middle of the it all. The hum of the bass line surrounds us, and the world falls away as we press together. Suddenly, we are in the woods beneath the trees we so often escaped to, and they are blanketing us, dancing in the cool autumn wind. We are dancing in the light of the moon that sneaks in flashes between the high draped limbs that promise to keep us safe from the rest of the world. His skin is on fire next to mine, and the glow of him is second only to staring directly into the morning sun. His light wraps around me on the forest floor and he washes over me as smoothly as the sweet wine we sipped as we cooked dinner last night in our tiny kitchen. He tells me the story of us again, and then reads to me from the book of his dreams, filling me with his hopeful, quiet heart. Confessing to my lips as his priest, he bows our bodies and I have no choice but to worship him the way I was born to.

This morning I sit alone, wishing for the woods again.

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Leon + Josie

There’s something about a vow renewal that’s just…romantic. A chance to recommit out loud. A chance to share that feeling again. To stand in front of the people who have come to know you as a couple, and say “I still choose you.”
Josie and Leon have been married 10 beautiful years, and since their first wedding was small due to military circumstance, they decided to have the party they’d always wanted in addition to their vow renewals. We had a gorgeous time in Aliso Viejo, and Josie and Leon could not have looked more fantastic together.

Here’s to renewing love, and choosing each other.

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She Let Go.

She had held on for too long.

Believing, with her whole heart, that if she was strong enough for both of them, she could weather his storms for him, that she could slay his dragons, and be his savior…because he had been hers. She stayed. She stayed in this town, in this place, because he didn’t want her to leave…but he didn’t want her. She waited, she wanted, and she cried in the shadows and the darkness, she lay crumpled on the floor in the wake of his absence and his empty acknowledgements. She reminded herself of the words he had told her, of the beautiful things that only she was to know…the things that, if she was honest with herself, she knew he was likely whispering to someone else as she wrote. She was too much…and she had been sitting in this town, sitting in this corner, waiting, punishing herself for being more than enough of a woman. Punishing herself for being capable of so much more than he was, punishing, degrading herself for being larger than life. She was not too much. She was not meant to sit in this town, in this dark corner of this home that was not her home, and die. She was meant for the stars, the mountains; meant for midnight conversations and the poetry of nature and the smile that a delectable cup of coffee brings to lips in the early hours of a lazy morning.

She was not too much.

He was not enough.

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Nathaniel + Allison || Quail Haven Farm

They met over dancing.

He walked in with their dog Rory. She walked down the aisle to Cowboy Take Me Away.
The girls wore shades of coral, the groomsmen all broke out their amazing line dancing skills during the party.

Allison and Nathaniel have made me smile since meeting them almost a year ago. They are the DIY couple of the century, planning and designing most of their own wedding all while doing a self remodel on their property they just purchased together. Going out line dancing with their friends all the while.

Thank you both for including me in your day, it was a pleasure and pure delight.

Venue: Quail Haven Farm, Vista CA
Hair: Bridal Hair by Cristina
Makeup: Kat Eyes Makeup

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